Why not an Apple?

 One might wonder why flowers instead of an apple? There is a simple explanation to that questions. It reminds me to be hopeful. To stand tall and find the sunshine through the clouds and turbulence of life.  In 2016 I was experiencing feelings I could not explain. In 2018 I was diagnosed with minor depression and have come to my own conclusion that I deal with mild anxiety as well. It was nice to finally put a name or condition to the feelings, but I was also devastated and overwhelmed. Honestly, I still am at times. A condition that I only have so much control over affects how I feel. When everything in my life seems to being going great, I can be overwhelmed with feelings of sadness, I lack the energy or motivation to do the things I now I should or need to do. Being human I am not always kind to myself when I fail to accomplish the things I need to. Exercise, sleep well, eat healthy are all simple steps I can take to help my depression, but it is hard when you lack motivation or energy. I am going to school to be a teacher and I want to try to be positive and look for the beauty in my life. I recently watched a conference called General Conference which is done twice a year by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I was reminded of the importance to prepare myself. I realized that often when I think of improvement I often get swallowed up in the world of health. Do this or that to be healthy or to look beautiful. There are so many more ways to improve oneself and prepare. My focus will be both secular and spiritual. I have, for the most part, disliked my school experience. I learn better by hands on not by writing a paper. So instead of focusing on how much I dislike school and simply getting through. I will share one thing I learn each week from both my secular and spiritual studies. I will post once a week, probably on Sunday, to share. I doubt anyone will read my posts but if you do I hope you gain something form them. I also hope that if you have questions that you ask. It might help me to delve deeper as I share more.

Thrown for a loop.

Well... Haha as you can tell my blogging consistency is pretty sad. :) Guys this past year has been pretty rough. I have had a hard time "findng" what I want to do with my life. I felt so disatisfied with life in Rexburg so I decided I needed a change and moved to Spokane. It was an interesting transition. It took me several months to find a job and then once I found a job I barley found a place to live my sister and brother-in-law moved. Im not going to lie it was hard to see them move. Now the closest family I have is 8 Hrs away.

Life in Spokane really has been pretty good. I have a good group of friends. I am trying lots of new and fun things. Yet I seem to have hit a wall again of feeling like I have no direction in my life. I have a hard time commiting to anything and my first thought is to run away from the situation. As I talked to my friend she suggested that I talk to the relief society president. SO I did, she is a psychology therapist. As I talked to her and explained all my feelings and struggles she said she would diagnose my with minor depression and anxiety but before she says that officially she wants me to see a doctor to rule out any physical reasons first.

Whatever this is, I feel like it is a big road block in my life. In some ways I feel that it has gotten worse. I hate this feeling. I hate feeling down even though I know there is no reason to and even though I have no desire to feel this way. I can't seem to shake it some days. I hope that going to the doctor and talking to Sister Holbrook will help me find a way to make these feelings more manageable.

Morsels of Chocolate!

So I just moved in with my lovely sister. We had just finished dinner. As we talked about how good dinner was and that will considered going back for seconds Achsah chimed in...oh and we have morsels of Chocolate. What??? Haha. She was talking about chocolate chips. Love it. 

About me

So I am the 11 of 15 kids. I grew up in Washington and loved it. I served a mission for the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day saints in Phoenix Arizona. I gradutaed from the RCMT Rexburg College of Massage Therapy. I decided I needed a change of pace so moved back to Washington. So excited for new adventures. I love to hike, camp, read, bike, run, art, dance, sing, and cook.

Back at it again

So I had started a blog along time ago when I was younger. I was really bad at keeping up with it all but I am hoping to write about all my new adventures. I am excited to post my thoughts and what I'm up to.